What’s your favourite St Patricks Day joke?
48 votes
The one about the Irishman who got caught stealing a calendar and got twelve months.
The one about how 19 Irishmen went to the movies because the sign said ‘under 18 not admitted'.
The one about the Irish lady who tried to sue a bakery for forging her signature on a hot cross bun.
The one about the Irishman who took a car door with him to the desert so that if it got too hot he could roll down the window.
The one about the Irishman who stood in the middle of a paddock because he wanted to win the Nobel Prize for being outstanding in his field.
The one about the Irish Sea Scouts who drowned because their tent sank.
The one about the Irishman who said that the best ten years of his life was third grade.
The one about a team of Irish who invented a helicopter with ejector seats.
The one about the Irish tap dancer who broke her ankle when she fell down the sink.
Other. I would love to hear it.

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Applemac12's avatar
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Leanndra51's avatar
I like the hot cross buns joke best, but I have a couple I really love that are just cute!

An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender approaches and tells him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it, and it would taste better if you bought one at a time." The Irishman replies, Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other is in Australia, and I'm in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days we drank together. So I drink one for each o'me brothers and one for me self." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there. The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way: He orders three pints and drinks them in turn. One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss." The Irishman looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns and he laughs. "Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains, "It's just that me wife had us join that Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking. But it hasn't affected me brothers though."

The other one I will note you because it has a swear word in it and although I do swear, I don't want to put it on someone else's page.